Oh, Me of Little Faith....

I was reminded today of how faithful, consistent and generous God is. While I was working from home, I was listening to a Christian radio station. The song "Come Home" by Luminate was playing. Part of the lyrics are "...you can't outrun grace. No, mercy doesn't care what you've done..."

While the song was playing, I began thinking about my struggle with having hope concurrently with faith. In a previous post, I talked about my struggle with disappointment over the last year. Struggling with having faith and hope together. I have faith, but hope sometimes eludes me when something potentially exciting comes up--because I don't want to be disappointed.

I can't out give God. He's more generous than I can ever be towards Him. And yet, when I'm struggling with my faith and having a hard time with having hope, He still keeps giving. He still keeps working even when I don't see the evidence of it.

And even when I sin or doubt God's power to provide and answer my requests in His timing, He cares about me.... and He keeps on forgiving me.

Every time.

And so I was reminded again of how good God is. Steve's regained partial control of the right side of his face as of yesterday. Today, there seems to be even more ability to move his muscles. We can guess what kind of treatment he's been following that's allowing the muscle movement, but in all reality, God's the one in control. And so we give thanks and praise to God for even this small blessing--which to Steve (and me) is huge!

When Steve showed me his face muscle moving, we were both elated! I'd never seen him so joyous! And I got the best hug ever from him! It's amazing how we take the little things God gives us for granted. I know I take for granted that I can smile with my whole mouth, because that hasn't been taken away from me.

And so we're learning to be more thankful for the little things... and praise God for the blessings He's given us in life. Not just the physical blessings.... but even more so the spiritual blessings.

Like not being able to out run God's grace.

And mercy not caring what I've done.

And God seeing me just as if I've never sinned.

And Jesus always being an advocate for me to the Father.

And that because of Jesus, I can have direct access to God and have confidence to approach His throne.

And my sins are forgiven.

So I get to be with God in heaven.

And that's worth telling others.

So, I may struggle with having faith at times. Not faith in God. Not faith that He even exists. But it's really about letting go of control of things that I can't do much or anything about. God has the power to do all things.... and I need to trust Him that He will. Because there have been so many answered prayers in the past and God has always provided.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

Walking by Faith

For those of you who don't stalk us on Facebook and who don't already know, Steve has Bell's Palsy. Don't be alarmed. It's not life threatening. It's not contagious. The nerve behind the ear controls the facial muscles on that respective side of the face. Bell's Palsy is a paralysis of one side of the face. In rare cases, both sides become paralyzed.

What causes this condition? The nerve becomes inflamed.

What causes the inflammation? No one really knows. There are theories that it might be from the cold virus, the cold sore virus, or lyme disease. But no one knows for sure. The only certain cause is due to a head injury. But we know he didn't hit his head. One doctor we saw this week believes it's connected to emotional stress. I guess really only God knows for sure.

How does it affect Steve?

Well, the right side of his face is paralyzed. If you've ever gone to the dentist and had your mouth numbed, it's like that, but worse. He can hardly move his facial muscles on that side of his face. The long term repercussions if he doesn't recover would be muscle atrophy. He has a hard time eating and drinking. He laughs still, but smiling is difficult. He makes the best of it.

What are the treatments?
Conventional medicines. Anti-inflammatory and anti-viral drugs.

We tried an accupressure therapy as was suggested by a friend who is in that profession and said he has successfully treated patients with Bell's Palsy. Steve has another appointment next week.
An increase of B-12 vitamin is supposed to help stimulate nerve healing. So, we've amped up his vitamin intake.

"Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. For we live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it." 2 Corinthians 5:6-9

A faith walk...

The Apostle Paul writes that we live by faith, not by sight. The other day we were talking about how having Bell's Palsy is frustrating for both of us in different ways. And we both concluded that it's not that bad. It could be worse. It could be life threatening. But then Steve would get to go home. It could be more dibalitating that it actually is. But it's not. It could be a condition that could get worse. But it doesn't. It can only get better. And we have a good life right now. We have a home. We have income. We get to be involved in ministry for God's Kingdom. We both have generally good health. We're not beaten. We're not persecuted. We're free. We have freedom to share the gospel with others. We actually have it pretty good.

And so, we thanked God for this unlikely blessing. It's been 2 weeks today since the paralysis happened. It's still frustrating for us as we're still adjusting to this malady. But we're trying to be positive and optimistic.

But we're both ready for complete healing to happen--more Steve than me. And if complete healing doesn't happen, God is still good and we'll still praise him.

And so we keep walking...