“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
~Jesus
Matthew 5:14-16
What kinds of good deeds to you do that are different than those around you?
I (Jewel) recently got a job working at a boys' home for at risk boys ages 11-17 (to supplement our income since we don't have much support right now). The boys I work with are 11-13 years old. To qualify to be a resident there, each boy has to be diagnosed as Severe Emotional Disturbed (usually as a result of some trauma/abuse they experienced earlier in life). There are generally secondary diagnoses that the boy also has (ADD, and/or Conduct Disorder, etc) and the therapist and staff work with the boy to remove those filters and modify his way of thinking to modify his behavior (aka character building). All of these disorder diagnoses are things that can be eventually eliminated to where the boy can be "normal" (whatever that is).
The goal of the home is to help the boy modify his behavior so he can be reunified with his family (if that's the best and safest option for the child) so that he can be "successful" in the world--that is, behave according to societal norms.
The hardest part for me isn't hearing them swear, watching them have meltdowns (tantrums) or even telling me they hate me when they have to do something they don't like. It's hard to be angry with a child who's been put through some things that no one should ever have to experience--ever. The hardest part is knowing that an adult hurt them and forced them to create unhealthy coping and defense mechanisms just to survive.
The other hard part is trying to be Jesus to them. Most of the other staff are kind and very helpful for the kids in being positive and yet firm when needed.
But sometimes it's hard to be a light in a dark world. But I press on and let it shine.
But what makes me different from the other staff? I want to show the kids that I am different because of what Jesus did for me. One kid I've gotten to know just got out of juvenile hall. I can't tell you much because of confidentiality laws. But what I can tell you is that he is a good kid. He's smart. He's fun. And he's just a kid.
But a kid that needs Jesus, too. A kid that needs to know he has a Savior who will never abandon him, who will always love him and who will always accept him back. For this kid, Jesus came. For this boy, Jesus lived. And for someone's son, Jesus died. And I want this young man to know that.
So while other staff are setting the lines and boundaries (which are needed)...I am giving him affirmation and positive feedback. And just having fun with him. (He told me twice that "I'm cool" and I believe it's because I love him and treat him with respect--like Jesus would.) Oh, I get to give the instructions and tell them to stop doing things, too. I set limits and boundaries. But I do it in a firm and loving way.
I love that at least for a time while they're working on their program to get out of there.... they do get to be kids. And I am blessed to be apart of their lives to make a difference.
So, how do I let my light shine?
I smile. I tell cheesy jokes. I show them respect. I listen. I seek to understand. I show them that I get excited about little things. (I did get excited the other day because we ate burgers and french fries for dinner one night.) I'm trying to help them see the positive and focus on the good.
But it's not about me. It's about what God is doing through me to reach them.
These boys have had it rough. It's been hard for them to enjoy life, even at the group home. So, my goal is to show them how they can enjoy life despite the non-fun things they have to do (becaus we usually have to do it with them--like clean, chores, etc). I want to help them see from a different perspective and to tell them about our God who loves them and even though they went through some awful stuff, our God is the Father that they have never had. That our Jesus is the best brother ever!
And that no matter what we've done- we are forgiven. And that no matter what we've been through, our God and Father loves us and will never leave us. I can't wait for the day I get to verbalize that to them. For now, I have to show it in action. And I hope and pray it opens more doors to discuss this with them.
My "goal" is to give them a reason to hope (1 Peter 3:15), to let my gentleness be evident (Philippians 4) and to share the joy of life with them. And to share how wonderful and awesome our God is!
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Roman 12:12
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
I Thess. 5:16-18
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